A Much-Needed Escape

A few weeks ago, our family went on a short vacation with three other families. This was our first time going on a trip with people outside of our own family, and we loved it! Everyone got along well, and the kids all had an awesome time playing together. 

The trip was a spur of the moment decision as we were sitting around the pool one day talking about how we were all starting to go stir crazy because of the stay at home order.  A few of us got on VRBO to start looking at houses and locations, and we finally found the perfect house in Port Sanilac, Michigan. Since social distancing was still important and not everything was opened back up yet, we decided to get a nice house with lots of amenities and stay just 3 nights. 

The property where we stayed was PERFECT for what we needed. It had plenty of room for everyone to sleep and have their own space. There was an indoor pool in the basement, which the kids loved! There was a game house (yes, a separate house not just a room) with pool, foosball, video games, ping pong, air hockey, and more. We were also located right on Lake Huron with our own little private beach.  There was a boat house with kayaks, paddle boards, and other beach must-haves. The fire pit right by the lake was an awesome bonus too! 

We had a very relaxing time, and it was so nice to get away from home for a little while. I wasn’t sure what to expect traveling with a group, but we all had such an amazing time, we are already planning a future trip! 

If you have any suggestions on places to stay and/or things to do for a large group, I’d love to hear them!

Powerful Affirmations

One of my favorite benefits of my Young Living business is the confidence and personal growth that I have gained. Our leaders strive to help us, not only with our businesses, but also to become better all-around people. 

Last week, I took part in a Zoom call led by Young Living Platinum, Kim Mahr. She was so honest and real, which is what I love in a leader! I want to share some of her knowledge that really hit home with me that I thought might also help others. 

When we are chasing after a goal, most of the time, we are the only things holding ourselves back. Language, especially self-talk, is so powerful! Negative self-talk leads to limiting beliefs, so it is important to practice manifestation and visualize how you want your life to look. 

Kim shared the 5 P’s of Powerful Affirmations:

1. Personal- You need to use “I,” “me,” or “mine.” You cannot affirm stuff for other people, only for yourself. 

2. Present Tense- Use the words “am” and “is” instead of “will.” The affirmation should be about right here, right now...not in the future!

3. Positive- Do not use negative words. 

4. Powerful- It needs to be strong, not weak. 

5. Praise- Pack it with gratitude! “I am so grateful that...”

Pick 3-5 of your limiting beliefs (I’m too shy, I’m not smart enough, etc.) and turn them into positive affirmations. Write each of these affirmations in a notebook five times everyday. Look in the mirror and say them to yourself each morning. You can also write them on sticky notes, put them on your computer or phone background, or anywhere else where they will be visible to you. 

Kim stressed that the motivation has to be for you, not anyone else. You cannot make it about your spouse, kids, parents, etc., which is the hardest part for me! We deserve to find a passion and to fill our own cups, which will, in turn, improve the lives of our loved ones as well! 

I have always struggled with affirmations. I’ve heard over and over again how important they are for a positive mindset, but I have never really put them into action. This time, I am going to give it a try and see the difference it makes. Below is one affirmation that I came up with and wanted to share. I’d love for you to come up with one of your own and share in the comments if you’re comfortable doing so.

Life Lessons From a Basketball

What do you notice about these two basketballs? One looks old and worn out and the other looks almost like new. My girls got these at the same time, so why is one in better shape than the other? The main reason is because the basketball on the right was taken care of better. Instead of being left out in the weather, it was kept in the garage when we weren’t using it. The one on the left has been used a lot more so it has more wear and tear and has even started losing air.

Seeing these basketballs side by side got me thinking how our minds and bodies are similar. With too much overuse and not enough care, our bodies start to wear out, and we might start developing health problems. By not taking care of our mental health, we might start to suffer from anxiety and/or depression.  Also, if we let ourselves be exposed to too much of the “weather” of the world, it can start to take a toll on our attitude and mindset.

So, what can we do to help keep our minds and bodies more like the ball on the right? This will be different for everyone. Maybe you need to take a break from or reduce your time on social media or other news outlets. You might need to exercise more or eat healthier. Some people benefit from positive self affirmations. It might help to pick up an old hobby that you used to enjoy but haven’t made the time for lately. Some enjoy listening to podcasts or reading inspirational and motivational books. Many of us need to learn to say, “No!”

Figure out what works for you, and make the time to take care of yourself both physically and mentally. Don’t wear yourself so thin that you start to “lose air” like the ball on the left. Surround yourself with positive people and don’t be afraid to lean on others for support when you need it.

The Importance of Empathy

I have seen and heard a lot lately about how certain groups of people's situations are nothing compared to trials that others have faced.  While this might be true, it does not lessen the feelings that people experience for any number of reasons or make their struggles any less important.  Everyone handles situations differently and people are affected to differing degrees.  What might seem trivial or unimportant to some, might be life-shattering or drastic for others.

For the high school seniors who have had their last year of high school cut short by the current school closures, this is a big deal. In the grand scheme of things or compared to events that other 18-year-olds have faced, such as going to war, some might say today's kids have nothing to complain about. However, to them, this is a huge deal! They are missing their friends, not getting to have a graduation or prom, and missing other milestones that are very important to a lot of people.

For people struggling with depression, alcoholism, drug addiction, or any other mental illness, social isolating might be a big deal.  I understand that essential workers are making huge sacrifices for all of us, and I am so very thankful for all of those people.  I don't know if I could be strong enough to be in their shoes right now. However, we also have to remember that asking some people to stay away from friends and family and to just stay home is also a huge sacrifice for them. They might need the distraction of work or other social interactions to keep them from falling off the wagon or having suicidal thoughts.  Both groups of people's feelings and struggles are very real and important, so we need to show empathy for all.

When we use phrases like "at least" or "it could be worse," it gives the impression that we are not empathetic toward their situation and don't understand it.  Instead of showing compassion, we seem to belittle or shame them for their feelings.  We don't need to compare our hard times and determine whose is better or worse, we just need to show empathy and understand that, to each individual, their feelings are real and justified.

Perspective in Adversity

While listening to the Rise Together podcast this morning, I took away a lot of great inspiration and practical tips that I thought might help some of you in this crazy time we find ourselves in.  The part that I most related to was about controlling our perspective and how we cope when we are faced with a difficult situation. Of course, this is fitting right now because of the pandemic, but this logic can be applied to any trying time. 

We cannot control what happens to us or around us but we can control our attitude and how we handle adversity.  In any situation, you can choose good or bad coping mechanisms. Some bad choices might include alcohol, pills, food, etc. Some good choices might be exercising, journaling, spending more time with family, etc.  

We have all heard that it takes 30 days to establish a habit, and we all know that this pandemic and social distancing is not going to disappear anytime soon.  Whatever habits you choose to form now will become your normal, whether you plan on it or not.  

While I have given in to some of the unhealthy ways of coping with stress, I am trying very hard not to make these my habits.  Instead, I am hoping that some of the positive changes I have been making will become our normal once all of this craziness settles down.  I have been exercising much more and making it a point to move my body in some way everyday.  I have been spending a lot more time outside.  I have been taking the time to do more things like shoot baskets or throw a softball with our girls when they ask. (I really can’t make the excuse of not having the time right now.)  We have been making more meals at home and eating together as a family. 

I know that this current situation is affecting everyone differently, and each person will need to cope in their own way. Just please remember to choose wisely. Strive to find joy everyday and help others do the same.  

Teaching from the Heart

This morning, as I was getting ready for church, I had a thought occur to me out of nowhere.  Since I have started teaching, I have had the chance to make an impact on around 320 young lives!!  When this thought occurred to me, it literally brought tears to my eyes.

I decided in the 3rd grade (thanks to my awesome teacher, Mrs. Hearne) that I wanted to be a teacher.  Most days, I can say that I made the right decision, but if I am completely honest, there are also days when I question if I made the right choice.  I have days when I know my patience ran thin with my students.  Anytime we have another test or standard pushed on us, and I know it isn't necessarily what is best for my students, I question whether I can stick it out and continue.  When I am at school AGAIN late in the evening or on the weekend instead of spending time with my family, I sometimes wonder if it is all worth it.  With all of the emphasis on testing and the bad things in the news about education, I was definitely starting to lose my passion for teaching!

Recently, however, I feel like my love for teaching is back!!  For the most part, I enjoy going to school and seeing my students every day!!  I look forward to hearing their stories and watching them grow and learn throughout the year.  I can't really say what the difference is, but I think my mindset has been a huge part of it.  I am focusing on building strong relationships with my students and have focused much more on the positive things happening in my classroom and school whether than dwelling on the negatives.  I still have to teach the standards, give the mandated tests, and follow certain guidelines, but I have decided to just do it and not dwell on and complain about the things I can't change.

In a perfect world, we would be able to teach at each student's level and not have to force rigorous standards on them that we know they are not developmentally ready for.  Teachers would be respected again and trusted to know what is best for our students since we are the ones in the trenches with them every day.  Instead of worrying about making sure they can pass a test, we would be able to focus on helping them become respectful, responsible, and kind human beings!

I will teach the standards and give the test because that is what I know I have to do to be able to keep my job.  However, I am also going to strive to build relationships and make sure that all of my students know that they are capable of anything that they set their minds to!  We are going to learn, but we are also going to have fun while doing so! At the end of our school year together, I not only want them to have grown academically but more importantly, I want them to become kind, respectful, and confident individuals.  

To my fellow teachers, the best advice I can give you is to keep doing what is best for your students!  Remember what helped fuel your passion for teaching in the beginning, and find that fire again!  Our kiddos need us, and they deserve nothing but our best!

Roll Away Financial Stress with the Debt Snowball Method

What are the factors that cause you the most stress in your everyday life and relationships?  I am guessing that, if you are being honest with yourself, most of you would say that money is toward the top of your list!  I know for me as an individual and for my husband and me as a couple, money has always been one of the most stressful things that we have to deal with as adults.  

Like most people, we have a lot of debt built up from student loans, credit cards, auto loans, etc., which means that we have struggled with living paycheck to paycheck.  Each payday, I would sit down and pay our monthly bills, and it always ended with feelings of frustration and helplessness because the money seemed to disappear just as fast as we earned it!  I started talking to friends and researching the best methods for paying off debt, and I came across Dave Ramsey's Debt Snowball Method.  After looking some information up online, we put this plan into action, and the results so far have been amazing!  I wanted to share how this method works in case anyone is not familiar with it.

Step 1:

The first step that is recommended is to build a $1000 emergency fund.  This will let you have a cushion for emergencies, such as auto or home repairs, unexpected illness or injuries, etc.  

Step 2:

After you build your emergency fund to $1000, you will need to organize all of your debt (except your mortgage) from the smallest to largest dollar amount owed.  In this case, interest rates do not matter.  This part was hard for me because I had always tried to pay the largest interest rates off first.  However, if you start with your smallest dollar amount, regardless of interest rates, you will see results quicker and therefore stay motivated to keep the snowball rolling!

Step 3:

Your next step is to start putting all of your extra money each month toward the smallest loan while you pay only the minimum payment toward all of your other debts.  You will keep repeating this each month until the smallest debt is paid off.

Step 4:

After your smallest debt is paid off, you will take the amount you were applying each month to that loan and apply that amount plus the minimum payment to the next largest debt on your list.  Keep paying minimum payments on all of the other debts.  

Step 5:

Repeat steps 2-4 until all of your debt besides your mortgage is paid in full!!

Since starting this method less than 2 years ago, my husband and I have paid off ten of our monthly loans, and it is such an awesome feeling!!  Once your snowball amount begins to build, you gain a lot of momentum and the results happen quicker and quicker each time you pay off the next loan.  We are beginning to see light at the end of what was a very long tunnel not too long ago, and it is such a huge relief!  Our dream is to be completely debt-free and to be able to pay cash for anything we need from then on.  Then, we will be able to enjoy freedoms like traveling and saving for our and our daughters' futures!